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BREAKING NEWS — Beatles biographer Mark Lewisohn just uncovered a new diary from Paul McCartney, suggesting the original lyrics to the 1968 hit “Hey Jude” were much different. Just as “Yesterday” originally came to Macca in a dream as a song about scrambled eggs, contemporaneous notes reveal that the seven minute epic was initially about future Minnesota Timberwolf Julius Randle‘s troubled history with the franchise.
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Canis Hoopus is proud to share an exclusive look at the original lyrics (sung to the tune of Hey Jude)
Hey Ju—lius Randle
You were decent, but not immaculate
Remember when you took it to Draymond
and backed him down under the basket?
Hey Ju, you got done wrong
by several members of the Buss family
You outplayed Zion and Ingram
and we get why you feel angry
And anytime you feel the pain, hey Ju, refrain,
Don’t treat your coach a little colder
The second apron is so cruel, hey Ju, you’ll do,
The turnaround you neeeeed is over your shoulder
Hey Ju—lius Randle
Take a bad shot and make it wetter
You’ll probably get numbers with the dumb Nets
But Karl-Anthony Towns is way, way better
Better better better better better better, oh!
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Na na na nananana, nannana, hey Ju… (repeat until George Harrison walks out on a rehearsal)
Hey folks, some real talk here. I know I just spent the last few paragraphs LARPing as Weird Al Yankovic, but deep down I’m just a Wolves fan with a big ol’ heart. I saw a lot of negative outbursts aimed at Julius Randle in the comments last playoffs and wanted to provide a nuanced assessment of his fun-but-flawed tenure in tree-stripes.
October, 2024 – Julius Randle’s wife allegedly says she prefers Twin Cities suburbs to New York City: I got hyped when someone on Reddit shared this rumor right after a clearly shocked Randle said he “just wants to be wanted” when he got traded on the eve of the ’24 season. Maybe she’s on to something–the Plymouth K.U.B.E. indoor playground is a dope place to bring the fam.
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November 17, 2024 – Ant hugs Julius after buzzer-beater. Unintentional hilarity ensued after Anthony Edwards gave Julius a jubilant hug to celebrate…
Source link : https://sports.yahoo.com/articles/nba-analysis-julius-randle-retrospective-160000258.html
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Publish date : 2026-09-21 16:00:00
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